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Thursday, January 21, 2010

TECHNO ROMANCE: DATING 2010


In the age where texting instead of talking, and social networking that can cause so much unnecessary drama, that it's almost comical, dating has changed. So what is appropriate and what isn't appropriate, I went straight to my friends (both girls and guys). And came up with a pretty good list of Do's & Don'ts that are pretty typical according to both sexes.

DO's

Understand the purpose of a "social networking site". Everyone uses a social networking site differently, some use it for business and some use it to really keep in touch with friends from high school, college, work, etc. Both sexes say that facebook can cause unnecessary drama because there is no respect boundaries.

Good Morning, beautiful. Is a great way to start the morning. The girls that have received these texts say that a morning text like that could make their whole day. And ladies, it's ok to start it off by texting your guy "Good Morning, handsome," I asked the men and they said that they'd smile if they received a simple text like that.

Allow comments. Allow the person you are dating to post on your "Wall". And definitely recipricate. The groups of men and women I spoke to, like to know that the person they are dating is thinking about them throughout the day, or like one of the guys said, "I like to know that she can't get me off her mind."

Keep your "stalkers" at bay. Ladies, we all know you are a sexy little thing, but the guys aren't really into reading about the other guys who leave you messages like, "I miss you, baby." Don't get me wrong it's ok that your friends who are the opposite sex might miss you, but 'baby' isn't appropriate. And guys, listen up, one of the pet peeves of the ladies, is the "girl" who comments on every single thing you post. You could post, "I just went to the bathroom" and that "girl" will "like it" or leave some lame comment. We kinda don't like "the girl" and it has nothing to do with being insecure at all, it has to do with appropriateness and respectful. And if we were in a different environment, she'd be what Vince Vaughn calls a "Stage 5 clinger" in Wedding Crashers.

It's ok to "like" a friend's photo, but, . . .ladies, let's be respectful of the fellas, do not like or comment something disrespectful on a male friend's photo that is shirtless. We all know that guy friend deserves kudos for putting in the extra time in the gym, but would you like it if a guy did that to a scantily clad female friend? Yea, exactly.


DON'TS

Here are a few warning signs that might hint that that person may not be "that" into you. Because if you address it and it's still happening, . . .I hate to say this, but move on, . . .Here are some of guys and girls gripes when it comes to 2010's and it's "Techno-Romance".

Communicate Clearly. Texting and email is great for short messages that you either do not have the time to say, or to see if you are still on for your date, running late, etc. The downfall behind texting, emailing, and facebooking is that "TONE" is 20% of your communication. The way someone says something is soo important. Not sure you understand, try this exercise. Say the phrase: "I love my job.", say it like you are so happy, you just got a job that you love. Now, say "I love my job.", as if your boss just came in and called you an awful name and handed you even more work to do. The words don't necessarily matter, it's more of the inflection. It's important to have "phone" conversations too. Guys, women fall in love between the ears. Ladies, men fall in love with their eyes.

When "SHE" writes "I LOVE YOU" every single day. Again, appropriateness, we get it, you like, or love each other, but guys do not need you to write that on their page every single day. And guys, girls aren't really a big fan of it either. It's like "pissing on your territory" and its not really attractive.

When "HE" facebooks more than he communicates with you. This actually works for both sexes. If you really like the significant other that you are dating, you should really try the whole texting "Good morning beautiful" or "Good morning handsome", before playing for hours on Facebook. Too much facebook can ruin a relationship. Jason says, "I adore this girl that I am dating, but when she is constantly playing on facebook and hasn't even acknowledged me for the day, it makes me wonder what is more important, Facebook or me." And ladies, I've heard it from you too. Michelle says, "One of my biggest pet peeves on Myspace is when the guy I am dating is posting all kinds of bulletins and blogs, but doesn't respond to any of my texts. Am I wrong?" Looks like we can honestly say now that social networking has increased our unemployment rate even more.

Don't get mad about it, Talk about it. If you are trying to have an "adult" relationship, both sexes, listen up! Instead of getting mad about something when it comes to techno-romance, such as, texting, emailing, and facebooking, TALK ABOUT IT.

If you are blocked/deleted, even after you have worked it out. Warning sign! Either the argument isn't ok, like you think it is or that person is just really not that into you. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out!

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